Revised Second Edition Parents see themselves as devout Catholics, but what do their children see? Do they see a mother and a father both living in contemplative love for God with a faithful emotional awareness of divine presence and engaged in an all-out battle with the evil of the world? More often than not children don't see living faith. They don't see protection from evil. They don't see genuine, fruitful devotion. They don't see genuine love for God. Instead, they see external acts of devotion as insincere because they see all the other things their parents do that contradict the true faith. Thus parents lose credibility-and when parents lose credibility, children become cynical and angry and turn to the social world around them for identity and acceptance. They become children who have more concern for social acceptance than for loving God. They are fallen children. Let's bring them back. CONTENTS Preface Part One: The Psychological Background Background | Family Systems | Marriage | Divorce | The Role of a Father | Anger | Domestic Violence | Child Abuse | Denial and Lies | Lust and Violence | Shame and Guilt | Disobedience | A Lesson from Dog Training | Physical Affection | Educating Children | Discipline: An Overview | Punishment | Growth | Responsibility | Boundaries | Shaping Positive Behavior | How to Say "No" to a Child | The Loss of Innocence | Helping Children Heal Part Two: Questions and Answers When Children Fall | Helping a Son | Cultural Subversion | Too Busy? | Parental Love for a Child | Breaking a Cycle of Hate | Botched | Honoring Your Parents | Anger at Parents | Unconscious Anger | Heart Attack | Blind to Your Own Anger | Sending Yourself to Hell | Paralyzed in a Dysfunctional Family | Danger to Society? | Procrastination | Undoing Past sins | Angry Trad | Revenge Factor | Keeping the Peace | Scruples | Anger Without Sin | Modesty | Tattoos | Discovering Masturbation | Lust and Marriage | Angry Baptist | A Nightmare Marriage | BPD Spouse | Old Love | The Yearning for Union | Why Marriage? | Desperate for a Child | Career or Family? Appendix I: Catholic Compassion Compassion | Chastity | Responsibility | Serving the Self | Disobeying God | Identity | To Die in All Things | The Proof Appendix II: Borderline Personality Disorder Appendix III: Gratitude Appendix IV: Deliverance Appendix V: A Love Letter Notes Index