A series of 29 short stories inspired by the vicissitudes of punishment in all its forms, its deliverers and recipients. Its universality across cultures and at every level of social life from the kitchen to the battlefield never ceases to amaze. The stories unveil the diverse motives and excuses for punishment that paradoxically form the foundation of that great shibboleth of humanity: justice. The stories range through childhood spats to military encounters, family discourse and dysfunction, to the puzzle of how criminal justice manages to match a punishment to its respective crime (it can't). Taken together, the stories ask one seemingly silly question of human history: which came first, the crime or the punishment?